Why men are just happier people

NICKNAMES: If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.  If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Bubba and WWWildman.

EATING OUT: When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it’s only for $32.50.  None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.  When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

MONEY: A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.  A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn’t need but it’s on sale.

BATHROOMS: A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel. The average number of items in the typical woman’s bathroom is 337.  A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.

ARGUMENTS: A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

FUTURE: A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

MARRIAGE: A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.  A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, but she does.

DRESSING UP: A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail. A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

NATURAL: Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

OFFSPRING:  Ah, children.  A woman knows all about her children.  She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.  A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY: A married man should forget his mistakes.  There’s no use in two people remembering the same thing!

H/t my ol’ friend Sol!

~Eowyn

Please follow and like us:
0
 

0 responses to “Why men are just happier people

  1. This has got to be one of the most brilliant observations ever penned. I am constantly amazed at the differences in the 2 sexes. My logical mind says that there just has to be a male out there that appreciates all the effort we make as women. I, for one, simply cannot hold my breath that long.
    Delightful and hilarious, Eowyn. I love how you think, what you do, what you do and don’t put up with on this site. It is indeed, magical.
    Godspeed, lovely lady….C. A. W. AKA…silverfire55

     
    • Gosh, thank you, lovely Carol! Your kind words are so encouraging and refreshing. I usually get death threats. LOL
      May God grace you with His love and peace. 🙂

       
  2. good post…
    Have you noticed when a man sees $9.99 he says its 9 dollars but a woman sees 10 dollars?

     
  3. Too, too true! However, I found that girls who were “tom boys” are usually the best life companions for men, as they seem to have an intuitive understanding of our quirks and needs/desires….

     

  4. ROFL!

     
    • Many thanks, LTG, for this always delightful mood-lifting epitome of male chauvinism! I believe he really had a GREAT time in this role, as in real life he was so unlike the curmudgeon he depicted. This is one of the few Broadway cast albums I have, along w/Camelot [which I sing along to as well!] and Showboat!

       
  5. So I got a few things in the bathroom…some of ’em I even forget what they are!
    Yeah, this pretty much sums it up. funny 🙂

     
  6. As I discovered over time, Eowyn… Even if the truth stings a bit at times, ’tis the truth that I would rather be told…and never a truer outline of details has been laid out, than has been written here… Some are humbling, some are enlightening, some are downright hilarious..all in all…cheers to a sip of this cup of truth.

     
  7. This was hysterically funny ! I was ROFL regarding the number of items in the bathroom ! …..lol I always enjoy reading the funny comments, as well ! Thanks for sharing. I love this website ! : )

     
  8. ROFL!! this is soo good. There are some other things I can think of. Hey Steve! where are ya?? (not picking on you,just razzing ya a little bit!!) Behind every good man,there’s a damn good woman!!

     

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *