The Sunday Funny Papers.

AN ATHEIST AND A BEAR

bear gifAn atheist was taking a walk through the woods, admiring all that evolution had created.

“What majestic trees! What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals!”, he said to himself. As he was walking along the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him. When he turned to see what the cause was, he saw a 7-foot grizzly charging right towards him. He ran as fast as he could. He looked over his shoulder and saw that the bear was closing, He ran even faster, crying in fear. He looked over his shoulder again, and the bear was even closer. His heart was pounding and he tried to run even faster. He tripped and fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up, but saw the bear right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw and raising his right paw to strike him. 

At that moment, the Atheist cried out “Oh my God!….” Time stopped. The bear froze. The forest was silent. Even the river stopped moving. 

As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky, “You deny my existence for all of these years; teach others I don””t exist; and even credit creation to a cosmic accident. Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament? Am I to count you as a believer?” 

The atheist looked directly into the light “It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask You to treat me as Christian now, but perhaps could you make the bear a Christian?” “Very well,” said the voice. 

The light went out. The river ran again. And the sounds of the forest resumed. 

And then the bear dropped his right paw ….. brought both paws together…bowed his head and spoke: “Lord, for this food which I am about to receive, I am truly thankful.”

th_clapping

~Steve~                       H/T          http://www.jokes.com

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0 responses to “The Sunday Funny Papers.

  1. Be careful of what you ask for , you just might get it !

     
  2. 🙂

     
  3. I remember I was hitchhiking in Idaho and this guy picked me up. I told him that I was a Christian and he told me that he was an atheist.

    I asked him if it was true that atheists believe that all knowledge comes through the five senses. He nodded in agreement. I told him that I had never experienced Russia with my five senses, so therefore there is no such place as Russia. I got his attention.

    I told him that sometimes, even in the secular world, we have to believe certain things and have faith in certain things. Example: I believe there is a place called Russia because I have seen Russia on a world map.

    I then said that I know God personally through my spirit. I also see His handiwork through my five senses.

     
    • Tim , good point.

       
      • Or another way to look at it . If the atheist is right , we’re just worm food when we die . But , other hand ; if believers are right , the atheist has a good possibility of looking pretty stupid standing before God and the ” white throne judgement ” . Like anything else in life ( or death ) actions and decisions have consequences . The atheist must be one hell of a gambler !!!

         
        • Pascal’s wager! — the classic and timeless argument for why, for our own self-interest, we should choose to believe in God instead of otherwise.

           
          • Thought you might like that one ! But it does give one something to ponder !!

             
          • Eowyn, so that’s what it’s called. Hmm
            It’s always been my theory that I try and live a good life, have faith and when the time comes, well if there is a God, I made the right choice, and faith made my life better.
            If I am wrong, well no harm no foul as my life was still better.
            On the other hand if an Atheist is wrong…Big Oops. 😥

             
    • Good rebuttal to atheists, Tim!

       
    • Tim, there was a movie called “The Santa Clause. With Tim Allen. Very funny.Tim Allen ( Who’s divorced in movie) becomes the real Santa and his 7 yr old knows .Anyway his 7 yr try’s to tell the Step dad who is a shrink and will not hear it.
      So the kid goes to Step dad (Judge Reinhold) “Have you ever seen a Million Dollars?”
      Step dad says “No”. Kid goes” Just because you haven’t seen it does not mean it’s not real”
      Kind of the same with faith.

       
  4. Tim Shey: I hope you don’t mind if I use your example on occasion such as jail ministry or outreach.

     
  5. Jill: Go ahead. I have had some interesting talks with atheists. I used to be an atheist myself between the ages of 15 and 18. I was going to a Catholic high school at the time—not a good combination. I got kicked out of a couple of religion classes.

    The mind that rejects God is such a dark place. I am very grateful that the grace of God drew me to Jesus.

     
  6. Great joke!
    Thanks, Steven! Keep them coming as this brighten my day!

     

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