The ‘Public Health Hazard Alert’ Caption Contest

This Caption Contest is now closed.

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This is the 224th world-famous FOTM Caption Contest!

Here’s the video:

You know the drill:

  • Enter the contest by submitting your caption as a comment on this thread (scroll down until you see the “LEAVE A REPLY” box).
  • FOTM writers will vote for the winner.
  • Any captions proffered by FOTM writers, no matter how brilliant (ha ha), will not be considered. :(

This contest will be closed in a week, at the end of next Tuesday, May 5, 2020.

To get the contest going, here’s my caption:

Snot isn’t the only bodily secretion Nancy wipes with her bare hands.

For the winner of our last Caption Contest, go here.

~Eowyn

Drudge Report has gone to the dark side. Check out Whatfinger News, the Internet’s conservative frontpage founded by a military veteran!

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Gunny T
Gunny T
2 months ago

I used to wipe my boogers under my desk when I was a child …

PenisBoy
PenisBoy
2 months ago
Reply to  Gunny T

For later consumption. We know gummy. We know.

Bee County Rep.
Bee County Rep.
2 months ago

DO NOT INJECT, our committee has determined that by spraying Lysol on your finger and running it under your nose, like this, you can kill the Corona virus.

DFJ150
2 months ago

To wipe out this viral pandemic we need universal health care, the green new deal, open borders, and…..ice cream.

TrailDust
Admin
2 months ago

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!
This should be a fun contest. 😀

truckjunkie
truckjunkie
2 months ago

And THAT’S the first problem with going out right after snorting cocaine…..

Kevin J Lankford
Kevin J Lankford
2 months ago

Believe me when I tell you;..Its snot what you think.

GregB
GregB
2 months ago

Becoming almost as senile as her mentally challenged buddy Joe, Nancy, in another moment of confusion, forgets what the handkerchief wrapped around her neck is supposed to be used for.

Jackie Puppet
2 months ago

Nancy gives herself a dirty sanchez!

Jackie Puppet
2 months ago
Reply to  Jackie Puppet

Who knows where that finger’s been? 😱🤢

GregB
GregB
2 months ago
Reply to  Jackie Puppet

I too thought about going with something along that same theme, but after shuddering at that horrendous thought, decided I would stick with something a little more um, shall we say, “sanitary.”

CalGirl
CalGirl
2 months ago

Set your watches. The signal is—when I wipe the snot on my nose, you all know it is time to run out and cough on every Republican in sight. If we can’t win with our platform and dimshit candidate—we can win by the law of attrition. Infect, Infect, Infect.

Watertender
Watertender
2 months ago

WooHoo! Smells like Hillary’s Depends!!!

Captain America
Captain America
2 months ago

I need to blow my nose. Now where did I put that Constitution?

chemtrailssuck
2 months ago

Nancy’s brains were leaking out.

MrB
MrB
2 months ago

Listen, I can’t reach that booger with my tongue or my teeth will come loose.