The Hide-in-a-Mattress Caption Contest

4 (80%) 1 vote

This is the 195th world-famous FOTM Caption Contest!

Here’s the gif:

About the gif: Spanish border police find African “migrant” in a mattress.

You know the drill:

  • Enter the contest by submitting your caption as a comment on this thread (scroll down until you see the “LEAVE A REPLY” box).
  • The winner of the Caption Contest will get a gorgeous Award Certificate of Excellence and a year’s free subscription to FOTM:D
  • FOTM writers will vote for the winner.
  • Any captions proffered by FOTM writers, no matter how brilliant (ha ha), will not be considered. :(

This contest will be closed in a week, at the end of next Tuesday, March 12, 2019.

To get the contest going, here’s my caption:

Come to the US-Mexico border, all ye dregs of the world! You can just saunter into America without resorting to tricks like hiding in a mattress!

For the winner of our last Caption Contest, go here.


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53 responses to “The Hide-in-a-Mattress Caption Contest

  1. I’ve been abducted by aliens .. I was sleeping last night and now I’ve ended up here .. am I in Spain yet?

  2. Another reason to buy Made in the USA. “You dont know what critters are hiding in an imported mattress!”

  3. The latest in Memory Foam technology. When they open up the mattress you remember you aren’t from this country.

  4. Charles H Slate

    The real reason Zyklon B was invented.

  5. Sleep ON it!

  6. Zip-ped-e-doda

    As of June 30, 2017, 793,026 people had been approved for the program since it began and nearly 900,000 renewals had been approved over the life of the program.

  7. “Huyu umpaka Mexico?” Swahili translation “Is this the border with Mexico?”

  8. The lazy man’s way to Make a Run for the Border.

  9. What are you doing opening the mail? I came Postage Paid!

  10. Dammit I shouldn’t have eaten those beans! They smelled it and thought I was a burrito….

  11. I was sleeping soundly. Why did you have to wake me up?

  12. Wow! An Ethiopian sandwich!

  13. Je, mimi kufanya hivyo kwa mexico? 🥺
    “Did I make it to Mexico?” In Swahili.

  14. “I slept in a Holiday Inn last night where the ‘Magic Fingers’ spoke Swahili”.

  15. BoyDownTheLane

    My Sleep Number is free… free, I say… freee, free, free.

  16. Thank Allah, I’m free! 2 sweaty goathumps buggered their livestock on me last night!

  17. You saved my life,this mattress was getting ready to start digesting me.

  18. chemtrailssuck

    So THIS is where all those bed bugs came from.

  19. chemtrailssuck

    Dear Mattress Firm,
    I recently purchased a mattress from your company, and I wish to complain. It is very lumpy and makes strange sounds when I adjust myself while sleeping. It also emits a noxious smell from time to time. Also, I noticed the mattress leaking an unidentified fluid. Please let me know where I can return it.
    Ann A. Gram

  20. chemtrailssuck

    At least THIS illegal came with his OWN mattress.

  21. Jackie Puppet

    Migrant: “Where is my sister & wife, Ilhan Omar (D-MN)?”

  22. “Hey, you clowns just voided my mattress warranty. Somebody’s gonna pay for this!”

  23. Jackie Puppet

    Black Lives Mattress!!

  24. Illegal migrant to human trafficker: “Give me liberty or give me bed”!

  25. A flesh eating zombie comes back to life after his mattress coffin is opened. Watch out!……don’t let him bite you!

  26. Oh, Hey, is breakfast ready??

  27. AltRightApostle

    Never buy any mattresses made in Somalia; It’s buy one, get one free.

  28. AltRightApostle

    Ilhan Omar’s long lost brother/future husband.

  29. A stowaway bed!

  30. Steven Broiles


  31. I thought this was a Emma Sulkowicz’s “Carry That Weight” event

  32. “Come on man! It’s Spain and I’m taking my siesta.”

  33. Secret of Magic fingers mattress finally revealed !

  34. Peekaboo!

  35. Well we didn’t quite make it but if you enjoyed this week’s challenge don’t forget to subscribe to our YouTube channel “Somalian Selfies with Merkel”

  36. Hey, I’m not trying to sneak into the country, they told me if I laid down in this sarcophagus I would live forever! Thank you for waking me up!

  37. So, this is how Alexandria Ocasio Cortez got into our country, as well.

  38. Oh, look! It’s a real live Sardine in the can!

  39. Attention Mike Lindell!-Attention Mike Lindell!

  40. What makes you think Kamala Harris is in here?

  41. Darned mattress feels lumpy…

  42. Wow, you guys running those knives all around scared the stuffings out of me.

  43. “I think Democrats are hiding votes in here. Let’s check to be sure.”


  45. EGADS! I didn’t know when I donated my old mattress to the GoodWill that they restuffed it with illegals!

  46. This caption contest is closed.


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