Tag Archives: toxic masculinity

Libtard Alec Baldwin has drink-throwing meltdown on NYC street

alec baldwin

Alec is headlining an Iowa demorat fundraiser this fall.

This demorat needs to learn to control his “toxic masculinity.”

From NY Post: Explosive actor Alec Baldwin had another epic meltdown on the streets of New York this week.

A fellow pedestrian at University Place and 11th Street tells us that the “30 Rock” star was seen in a verbal exchange with a presumably reckless motorist that included insults and soft-drink throwing.

“Baldwin called the driver of a big black SUV ‘a meatball’ and kept asking him and the passenger to get out,” said the witness, who noticed the incident after it had already begun.

When the people in the SUV wouldn’t get out, “Alec got out his phone and started videotaping them. They pulled away right after, and he took a pic of their license plate and threw his extra-large drink in the street. Then he just went on his angry way.

Baldwin’s rep had no comment.

In 2014, the actor was arrested in the same area for biking the wrong way down Fifth Avenue and reportedly becoming “belligerent and . . . arguing” with cops.

He also went on a Twitter tirade against an Upper West Side Starbucks barista in 2011, and delivered a homophobic rant against a Post photographer in 2013.

DCG

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Isn’t this special: Justin Trudeau is raising his kids to be feminists

justin trudea and hillary clinton

Justin Trudeau with his “feminist” buddy Hillary

Questions for Justin:

From what I’ve seen in the world, women face unequal obstacles every day because the left’s definition of feminism is enabling men and women to silence, demean and belittle people of both genders. Their quest for power is silencing vulnerable voices every day.

From Marie Claire (by Justin Trudeau): I am in politics because every day, I get to work to make the world a little better—for my kids, and for yours. I’m proud of the dedicated work our team is doing to make Canada more open, more inclusive, more just—and gender equal. But some of the most important work I do is not as a political leader, but as a parent. Every day, at home, I have the astonishing and humbling opportunity—together with my wife Sophie—to nurture empathy, compassion, self-love, and a keen sense of justice in our three kids.

I am so exceptionally proud of my daughter Ella-Grace. She’s growing up kind, super-smart, a passionate debater, open to the world around her. I love Ella, and I worry—because as a father, son, husband, and citizen, I witness the unequal obstacles women and girls face every day. It’s 2017, yet in Canada and around the world, women and girls still face violence, discrimination, stereotypes that limit them, and unequal opportunities that keep them from achieving their dreams. It is maddening to me that my brilliant, compassionate daughter will grow up in a world where, despite everything she is as a person, there will still be people who won’t take her voice seriously, who will write her off—simply because of her gender.

I can—and do—work every day to shift those inequalities, even incrementally. But I also know that the most powerful medicine will come from Ella herself. Sophie and I can’t be there with Ella at every hard moment of her life—to protect her when someone makes her feel small, to advocate for her when someone isn’t listening—even if we wish we could. (Parents will relate.) So the best thing we can do is to help Ella learn, unshakeably, that she is enough, exactly as she is. That she has immense power, and intrinsic worth, which no one can ever take away from her. That she has a strong voice, which she can use, and trust.

That means raising her feminist. Full stop.

I’m eternally lucky to have an amazing partner in that project. Sophie continues to inspire and challenge me, and a few years ago, she helped me reach a turning point. I was talking about teaching Ella that she can be anything she wants to be. Sophie said, “That’s great—but how are you raising your sons to be strong advocates for women and girls, too?”

Gender equality is not only an issue for women and girls. All of us benefit when women and girls have the same opportunities as men and boys—and it’s on all of us to make that a reality. Our sons have the power and the responsibility to change our culture of sexism, and I want Xavier and Hadrien—when he’s a little older—to understand that deeply. But I want, too, to help them grow into empathetic young people and adults, strong allies who walk through the world with openness, love, and a fierce attachment to justice. I want my sons to escape the pressure to be a particular kind of masculine that is so damaging to men and to the people around them. I want them to be comfortable being themselves, and being feminists—who stand up for what’s right, and who can look themselves in the eye with pride.

Feminism is not just the belief that men and women are equal. It’s the knowledge that when we are all equal, all of us are more free. It’s a relentless commitment to look for ourselves in each other, because that’s how we start to build a world where everyone is treated with respect and recognition. And it’s the unwavering conviction that all people have the same rights and freedoms—that my rights are your rights, and it is only when your rights are fully protected that mine are, too.

That world doesn’t exist yet. But it can be built—by people who have a strong sense of justice and empathy, who stand up for the rights of others, and who seek out their own unique ways of creating more inclusive communities.

That’s the world we want to live in. That’s the world we want our kids to live in. To raise our kids feminist is to recognize that they ALL have a part to play to build that world. To raise our kids feminist is to honor their future, because they have the responsibility—and the power—to shape it for the better.

DCG

Feminists are insufferable: Tweet of a man rescuing a woman and child is “sexist”

houston rescue

Toxic masculinity at work in Houston/AP Photo

A picture of a man rescuing a woman and her child in the Hurricane Harvey tragedy surfaced on the internet (see the above precious photo). It has caused much scorn for the feminists and gender study professors about the role of men and women in society.

Matt Walsh, a columnist for The Blaze, tweeted out the above picture with the caption, “Woman cradles and protects child. Man carries and protects both. This is how it ought to be, despite what your gender studies professor says”

This tweet and the accompanying photo set the internet ablaze with cries of his tweet being “sexist,” “outdated” and “misogynistic.”

Time Magazine (via Fortune) had an “actual gender studies professor” weigh in on the “controversial” tweet.  Christina Wolbrecht, associate professor in the Department of Political Science and director of the Program of American Democracy at the University of Notre Dame, responded to Walsh’s message in a series of 12 tweets.

Here’s what the gender studies professor had to say:

Care work (for children, infirm, elderly) is necessary for human flourishing & has been traditionally performed by women for free, which contributes to women’s lesser financial & politics power. As care work has moved into the market, it remains poorly paid & overwhelmingly female, which again makes women more vulnerable. We [love] to laud a woman “cradling her child” but don’t provide paid maternity leave or support quality childcare & good pay/benefits for childcare workers (women, immigrants). But wait! There’s more! As budgets for care work (mental health, health care) have been cut, a lot of that work has shifted to agencies like police & fire, who often lack training & capacity, and result in troubling outcomes. At same time, economists note that a central challenge to male workers is skills mismatch – men reluctant to take jobs in expanding care sector, partly bc jobs are “female”, partly bc they are low paying, low prestige (bc their “women’s jobs”). IN SUM your rigid and illogical sexual division of labor, & related hierarchy of value, hurts both women & men, the US economy, & the flourishing of society as a whole. The value of work – holding the baby or carrying the mother should be recognized & rewarded, no matter who performs it. Given how much care is needed, all hands on deck.”

If I am mistaken, I believe Mark’s original tweet DID recognize and reward the mom for protecting her child. But that’s not good enough for the libtards who can’t see the natural and instinctual beauty in a man rescuing and protecting a mother and child.

Of course, the idea that a man should have to rescue a woman and child is a NO NO for feminists. In their minds, we need to erase the social and cultural constructions of masculinity. After all, they don’t need a man to save them!

Here’s the difference between feminists and conservative women (who absolutely LOVED that tweet/photo): We understand the physical and mental differences that God gives men and women. God designed the fundamental biology of each sex for specific reasons that we should celebrate.

We completely adore the strong men in our lives who protect us, shelter us, love us, and would give their lives for us. We value them for being the testosterone-filled manly-men that they are!

IN SUM, this toxic masculinity is a beautiful thing!

DCG

Men’s Grooming Guru: ‘Masculinity Is So Fragile, It’s So Toxic’

david yi

The feminist and beauty guru, David Yi


Um, no. I want a real man, not a genderless and sexually fluid feminist.

From Yahoo: David Yi, the founder of a men’s beauty and grooming online destination for millennials and Generation Z called Very Good Light, cultivated a love for skin care and grooming at a young age.

“Being a Korean-American, we were slathered with SPF. Ever since I was a child, my mom and dad showed us how important skin care was,” Yi tells Yahoo Beauty. “They knew beauty was something that came from the inside out, but people take notice of your skin. Skin care is about pampering yourself. You have to be your biggest ally and supporter before anyone else. It’s an inner confidence that pushes you through the entire day.”

After stints as a writer and editor for media outlets like Mashable, WWD, and the Daily News, Yi decided to address the huge gap in the beauty industry for men and personal care. “I felt that there needed to be a new voice, especially for Generation Z. This generation is more genderless and sexually fluid than any other generation.”

So Yi created Very Good Light to fill that void. “I launched something to cater to that guy who felt he didn’t fit into that definition of ‘masculinity‘ or the confines of what it means to be a male in 2017,” he says. “It’s all about inclusivity, celebrating who you are and who you want to be; normalizing men and their behaviors, normalizing makeup, normalizing beauty, and that everyone has a place to call home.”

However, Yi stresses that Very Good Light does not cater to just one “type” of man. He explains, “We don’t have to sell it out as an ‘inclusive’ and ‘woke’ brand. We want that to exude through our site and the content we produce.”

He continues, “I think the biggest misconception is that the site is only LGBTQ-related, and it’s not. If you’re in tune with your body and face, and you like to pamper yourself, that doesn’t make you one thing or another. It’s pretty judgmental to box someone into a sexual category just based off their morning skin care routine or what grooming products they use. I want to tear that down or the notion that beauty is only for a specific individual.”

These archaic notions of men and pampering are simply “fractions of fragile masculinity,” according to Yi. He says, “Right now, masculinity is so fragile, it’s so toxic. I feel once we shatter those stereotypes and get out of those confines, that is what will push us forward. Once we start changing men and making them ‘feminists,’ making them allies for people of color or the LGBTQ community, that’s when the world starts to change.

Celebrities like Young Thug and Jaden Smith have helped redefine gender-fluidity through fashion. “These are young men who are swaggy, at the top of their game, and whose masculinity is never going to be questioned. They are blurring the lines between genders; they wear womenswear, and they don’t care what people think. I feel like they are the ‘poster children’ for Generation Z and what that generation stands for. It’s about being bold, brass, brazen, and expressing yourself in an authentic way.”

Of course, websites like Very Good Light, no matter how “progressive,” have faced adversity. “People thought it was a brilliant idea that was vital, but there’s definitely been push back. Being a men’s grooming site, in general, a lot of people can’t understand that. In small town or rural cities, they may not understand the movement of men’s beauty or gender and sexual fluidity.” 

Question for you Mr. Yi: Do those who live in the small towns of the sandbox understand men’s beauty and gender and sexual fluidity? Are the citizens of the sandbox inclusive? Are they “woke?” Maybe they just don’t understand…

h/t to my toxic masculine boyfriend who lives in a small town in the USA😊

DCG

James Bond Sends ‘Toxic’ Message About Masculinity

Pajama Boy approved.

Pajama Boy

From Heat Street: On International Men’s Day, a Conservative MP said that James Bond and characters like him send a “toxic” message that “a real man is fearless and emotionless,” as well as ”aggressive, disconnected and walking alone.”

Film’s idealization of stoic heroes can have devastating real-world consequences, Caroline Dinenage said, specifically mentioning James Bond, Gordon Gekko, and Steven Seagal’s action heroes.

james-bond

“I think there are risks, particularly for those who are vulnerable or isolated and these messages can be particularly toxic for men suffering from mental health issues,” said Dinenage, who is also the parliamentary undersecretary of state for women, equalities, and early years. “We live in a culture where men are expected to be strong, tough and macho, which is why men sometimes bottle up their feelings, and possibly why there is such a high suicide risk with men,” she added.

In the UK, the male suicide rate is at its highest in 15 years, becoming the leading cause of death for men under 45. Three-fourths of all suicides there are male.

DCG

Duke offers men a ‘safe space’ to contemplate their ‘toxic masculinity’

Raising a nation of wussies.

Pajama Boy Approved

Pajama Boy Approved

From Fox News: Duke University is famous for its science and engineering programs, as well as its dominance in college basketball. Now, it may also become known as a great place for men to gather and contemplate why they’re such horrible people.

The Duke Men’s Project, launched this month and hosted by the campus Women’s Center, offers a nine-week program for “male-identified” students that discusses male privilege, patriarchy, “the language of dominance,” rape culture, pornography, machismo and other topics.

The student newspaper’s editorial board endorsed the new program, insisting it was “not a reeducation camp being administered by an oppressed group in the service of the feminization of American society.” But it’s easy to see why they felt the need to defend against such concerns.

Dipro Bhowmik

Dipro Bhowmik

Junior Dipro Bhowmik, who sits on the leadership team, recently said the goal of the Duke Men’s Project is for male students to “critique and analyze their own masculinity and toxic masculinities to create healthier ones.”

Click for more from Heat Street.

DCG

British Author: ‘We don’t need to be the men our grandfathers were’

The debut author’s study of ‘toxic masculinity’ was uncomfortable to write, but he says it’s fired with hope that clichéd male behaviour can be unlearned.

Pajama Boy Approved

Pajama Boy Approved

The author, Jack Urwin

The author, Jack Urwin

From The Guardian:  When Jack Urwin was nine years old, his father Richard died on their bathroom floor. He’d had a heart attack. This was the first time that the Urwin family had heard of him having heart problems. That was not the case for Richard: his post-mortem revealed significant scar tissue, indicating a previous attack, while weeks later, Jack’s mum found angina medication in the pocket of one of his jackets. He’d known, but never said anything.

Weeks later, Jack won the epithet “funniest pupil” at school. The absurdity of this, he would write a decade later in a Vice article, was that he had never been particularly funny, but a fierce appetite for humour had been born from his father’s death. “After he died, jokes took preference over sincerity in almost any situation,” he wrote, “because the idea of picking at wounds and revealing the fragile human beneath was about the most terrifying thing I could comprehend. It’s a trait I now recognise as one of my father’s greatest flaws, ultimately contributing to his downfall. It’s also an inherent characteristic of so many men.

The article, A Stiff Upper Lip Is Killing British Men went viral online on its publication in 2014. Urwin, then 22, was struck by another absurdity: as hundreds were lauding him as a fresh new voice on gender, as feminist writer Laurie Penny was messaging him about finding an agent and as Irvine Welsh was praising his piece as “fabulous” – he was stuck working a shift in a bar, unable to respond to any of it. Two years on, it is still easy to see why it took off: Urwin’s voice is honest, young, funny and sad. On a poignant, humorous note, his piece ends: “Please: start talking. I don’t want to have to write a whole book about this stuff.”

On the day I meet Jack about his whole book, the Orlando nightclub shootings have happened overnight and the world is still trying to process why the gunman killed 49 people. Fights are breaking out at the Euro 2016 championship in France, with a Russian politician tweeting his support of Russians attacking English fans: “Well done lads, keep it up!” It is a heavy day to be talking about masculinity; he wrinkles his nose when I bring up the news.

You might need some masculinity to fight the Muslim terrorist.

You might need some masculinity to fight the Muslim terrorist.

“We do need to look at how we ascribe meaning to these events,” he says. “That 98% of mass shootings in the US are by men is never mentioned. If 98% of mass shootings were committed by Muslims or black people, there would be uproar! And you don’t see women trashing bars in Marseille.”

man up book

Urwin’s first book, Man Up, is all about what he calls this “toxic masculinity”: the public performance of masculinity that is conditioned into men from birth, the idea that acknowledging weakness is a weakness itself. Boys don’t cry, listen, talk about feelings: every caricature that is mined for advertising and sitcom fodder is rooted in a more sinister truth that produces real problems: like violence, sexism and mental illness. Britain’s “lad culture” – which Urwin defines as “vile, shitting-in-pint-glasses, rape-culture-perpetuating behaviour” – is at its heart one big pantomime, fuelled by the attention of the men involved.

Urwin himself might be mistaken for one of his male performers – tall and with a burly frame that would probably look serious on a rugby pitch – but the personality that goes with it is warm and acutely, almost apologetically self-aware.

“There is something about the male personality that means we are so driven by a mob mentality,” Urwin says. “I remember from school how fascinating it was to see how perfectly intelligent boys could spur each other on.” He reels off a list of “games” he played with other boys: pushing on someone’s chest until they fainted; flicking coins at each other’s knuckles; spraying deodorant up one’s nose; drinking Tabasco sauce. “I wasn’t an idiot. I knew this was stupid behaviour. But I still took part in it. Why? A sense of belonging I think. You don’t want to be the only one in a class of 30 not doing the masculine thing. It makes them perceive you as effeminate or gay.”

He doesn’t buy that this comes down to something innate in his gender – what the British Medical Journal calls “male idiot theory, or “evolutionary neuroandrogenic theory”, which links more testosterone to more aggression. “I have a problem drawing links such as these, as I fear they are all too often used to justify awful behaviour while ignoring the greater issue of how we are brought up and socialised to act,” he says.

How men are socialised to act is a product of history, Urwin argues in Man Up: he traces the concept of masculinity from the birth of “behavioural modernity” 50,000 years ago, up to today’s “lads”, who he thinks were born from a desire to emulate the disappearing working class. One element Urwin returns to frequently is why men don’t talk about their feelings – an attitude he believes was handed down father-to-son from the two world wars. He does not exempt himself from this problem: “My partner says, ‘You literally wrote a book about talking more!’ But when you are writing, there is this level of detachment that you don’t get when talking. You can remove yourself from what you are writing about, almost as if it is fictional.”

This freedom allowed Urwin to share something he had never spoken about before: a period of self-harm when was 13. When his family read the book, there was some unhappiness. “It was very difficult for them knowing I felt able to share that with the whole world but not with them. I agonised over sharing it in the first place, but if it reaches someone who is ashamed about self-harming, I thought it might be a valuable resource. My mum was saying, ‘Why did you never tell us about this? You’ve written a book about being more honest, but you’ve kept a lot of stuff from us.’” He suddenly laughs. “I was fairly certain my family hated me for a while. I still need to do some bridge building.”

As is often reported, there is a huge disparity in suicide rates between genders: men are three times more likely to complete a suicide attempt than women. However, the last Adult Psychiatric Morbidity in England survey found that 7% of women and 4% of men in the UK had attempted suicide, which Urwin believes indicates another problem: “Some research suggests that men use more violent methods, because in that point of absolute despair, this is a way they can claw back some success. If they fail, it is a humiliation. Of all the ways our masculinity is killing us, there is nothing more harrowing than a man feeling successful if he completes his suicide.

As the problems came before, Urwin feels a solution will also be produced from generational change.It is like racism and homophobia – we sort of have to wait for some people to die out. I think some people can be changed, but when you get to middle age, it is very difficult to unlearn everything you’ve always known. But our attitudes to gender and sexuality are a world apart from 50 years ago. We don’t need to be the men our grandfathers were.

serious

While the book is in early days, Urwin is happy about the reception it has received: “It has left me feeling quite optimistic about the future of humanity.” He is thankful that women and feminists have been supportive; Urwin is a vocal feminist and is confounded by the idea that men and feminism are somehow at odds.

feminism

For anyone new to today’s online dialogue, discussions of gender and abuse tend to go hand in hand. But bar a few run-ins with Men’s Rights Activists (MRAs) online, who argue men are now at a disadvantage due to the progress of feminism, Urwin has remained unscathed. When I write about women or gender, I pre-emptively logout of Twitter, I say; Urwin winces. “That is a male privilege,” he says. “For the most part, I don’t have any trouble, even when I support feminism.”

What he is finding troubling is dealing with praise. Men have lauded Man Up as something bold and new, but Urwin is hyper-aware of his female predecessors. “A lot of this has been touched on before but mostly by women. There are lots of ideas that aren’t necessarily new but people are celebrating me for them. It does feel a bit bad.”

He looks grim, then huffs a laugh. “I am not going to argue with it too much though. I want to sell books, on the cynical side of it.”

DCG