Hold the Chickens

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A farmer stopped by the local mechanics shop to have his truck fixed. They couldn’t do it while he waited, so he said he didn’t live far and would just walk home.

On the way home he stopped at the hardware Store and bought a bucket and a gallon of paint. He then stopped by the feed store and picked up a couple of chickens and a goose. However, struggling outside the store he now had a problem – how to carry his entire purchases home.
While he was scratching his head he was approached by a little old lady who told him she was lost. She asked, “Can you tell me how to get to 1603 Mockingbird Lane?”

The farmer said, “Well, as a matter of fact, my farm is very close to that house I would walk you there but I can’t carry this lot.”

The old lady suggested, “Why don’t you put the can of paint in the bucket. Carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm and carry the goose in your other hand?”
“Why thank you very much,” he said and proceeded to walk the old girl home.
On the way he says, “Let’s take my short cut and go down this alley. We’ll be there in no time.”
The little old lady looked him over cautiously then said, “I am a lonely widow without a husband to defend me. How do I know that when we get in the alley you won’t hold me up against the wall, pull up my skirt, and have your way with me?”
The farmer said, “Holy smokes lady! I’m carrying a bucket, a gallon of paint, two chickens, and a goose. How in the world could I possibly hold you up against the wall and do that?”

The old lady replied, “Set the goose down, cover him with the bucket, put the paint on top of the bucket, and I’ll hold the chickens.”
H/t my ol’ friend Sol.

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0 responses to “Hold the Chickens

  1. With so much perversion and vulgarity in the world today, why would you
    post a raunchy joke like this? Conservatives who love America deserve better then what you have to offer.

    • Perversion and vulgarity? You must be speaking of the OWS protestors…
      It’s a joke – we do have to maintain a sense of humor with all that is happening to our country.

    • Hey, Bash,
      Just how is this joke “raunchy”? I say it’s your mind that’s filthy.
      You must be a whole load of fun at parties. Not.

    • Cal – Hmmm…Thanks for your ‘holier-than-thou’ insight into your character….found it quite easy to “cast the first stone” eh?
      Ever heard of laughter… fun… joy? … Oh yeah, riiiight… One would need to be humble to understand such inner gratification of the soul….
      Oh well, try to have a nice day anyway… (you may want to cut down on your starch intake – as it seems to have accumulated on your personality 😉 )


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