Hints for Home Schoolers – Socialization?

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By far and away, the number one stated objection and obstacle to home schooling is the perceived idea of “socialization.”  Anyone contemplating or actively home schooling has encountered this phenomena.  Often a relative or friend will pucker their foreheads, and ask -“But what about socialization?”  Where oh where did this concept originate?  The Public School System!  That’s right!  Socialization and “self concept” are psycho-babble inventions of the government pagan shrines known as public schools.
“. . . self-esteem is a concept that was born in the school system, and it is best for parents not to overemphasize the self-esteem of their children. Professor Martin E.P. Seligman, in his helpful book The Optimistic Child, discusses how self-esteem has been more and more emphasized in schools during precisely the same years that the youth suicide rate has increased in the United States.   [learninfreedom.org]
From Dr. Larry Edward Shyers research  –  “using a “blind” procedure, found that home-schooled children had significantly fewer problem behaviors, as measured by the Child Observation Checklist’s Direct Observation Form, than traditionally schooled children when playing in mixed groups of children from both kinds of schooling backgrounds. This observational study was reported in some detail in the 1992 Associated Press article. Shyers concluded that the hypothesis that contact with adults, rather than contact with other children, is most important in developing social skills in children is supported by these data.” [ibid]

In the public school system, children are socialized horizontally, and temporarily, into conformity with their immediate peers. Home educators seek to socialize their children vertically, toward responsibility, service, and adulthood, with an eye on eternity. 

[Thomas C. Smedly, MS]
I could regale you with countless statistics, opinions, research,  and true life stories to counter the negative claims about home school socialization, but I will restrict myself to just this very meaningful one, from former U.S. Department of Education researcher, Patricia Lines:

If I didn’t know anything about someone other than their [sic] educational background, I’d rather hop in  a foxhole with a homeschool kid than one from a public school.  The homeschool kid will be a little better educated and dependable.  It’s just the law of averages.  [The Harsh Truth About Public Schools, Bruce N. Shortt, p. 350]

Homeschoolers do not claim the title for close family relationships, but in my experience, I have never seen a severed family relationship in a homeschool family.  But I do know many, many  non-homeschool parents  that have children they don’t speak to, or children that don’t speak to each other, or both.  If I could just let you experience  some of the silly giggling  (laughing at themselves or something we were reading) that went on during our years and years of home school – you would pray that every child in the world could be home schooled within a loving family, instead of being daily subjected to insecure teachers, peer pressure, indoctrination, and academic discrepancies. 
Will your children be considered “unusual” or even strange by their worldly counterparts?  Probably.  Does that matter?  Not in the long run. There is a distinct difference between positive and negative socialization.   If you make an effort to involve your kids in 4H,  a home school activity club, etc., they will undoubtedly meet other “unusual” home schoolers. If kids from Godless public schools are normal, I suggest that you and your critics should be delighted that your kids are weird.  Since God was removed from public schools in 1963:

  • Violent crime has increased  995%
  • Premarital sex has increased 1,000% in 15 year olds, 300% in 16-18 year olds
  • Suicide has increased 300%

Rather than self-esteem, the home school family is concerned with God-esteem.

Jesus first, others second, me last.

Even a two year old can memorize that. . .

My go-to, super easy, lifesaving recipe for barbecue chicken!
1. Spray inside of crock with cooking spray
2. Slice one onion and place in bottom of crock.
3.  Put boneless, skinless chicken breast halves on top of onions
4. Pour some barbecue sauce on chicken pieces
5. Cook on low for 6-8 hours, or high 4-5 hours.
Everyone loves this, even little ones.  You can also substitute sweet and sour sauce with excellent results.  If you are fortunate enough to own two crock pots, throw some baking potatoes in the second crock , and you will have the perfect side for the barbecue chicken!  If you like tender skins, wrap in foil, if you like them crusty, sans foil.  Exact same cooking times  as chicken.  I served this barbecue chicken at my daughter’s rehearsal dinner, and it received rave reviews from young and old.  There is nothing like long, slow cooking to bring out the best flavor.  In addition – very low energy consumption!

14 For this cause I bow my knees unto the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ,15 Of Whom the whole family in heaven and earth is named,16 That He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with might by His Spirit in the inner man. . .

Ephesians 3: 14-16



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0 responses to “Hints for Home Schoolers – Socialization?

  1. Not surprised that “socialization” is a product of public schools. They want nothing more than to dumb down kids to believe we are all equal yet there are “special” people (transgenders). You can’t have an “offending” opinion and we must level the playing field. Totally opposite of the real world.
    Self-esteem, and the ability to interact with others, comes from loving parents that instill confidence in their children. Not public indoctrination.

  2. I’ve seen article after article that the “Self Esteem Movement” that began in public schools since the 1990s led to a huge and measurable surge of narcissism among America’s young people.
    Self esteem can only be earned — it’s the result of real achievements. False “self esteem” (praises for having done nothing, but just for being you) is the sure recipe for breeding a whole nation of NPDs (Narcissistic Personality Disorder).
    What more self-esteem do we need, knowing that God made us in His image and loves us so much He sent His only Son to die for our sins?

    • Dennis H. Bennett

      Eowyn: I wonder how many kids started the chorus: “I’m feeling so bad today about myself. My parents don’t make me feel good about myself. Will you do it, teacher? Does the teaching profession have any idea of how their “strategies for teaching” are sometimes prompted by the content of their material?

  3. Love this! I’ve come up with my own response to the dreaded socialization inquiries. It usually comes up after my kids have played with the other kids for a while, or had practice with their teams a few times. Parents start asking “so, where do your kids go to school.” When I tell them we homeschool they are usually surprised and had no idea, because surprise, surprise, my kids fit in just fine. So when the socialization issue comes up, I politely remind them that they didn’t have a clue other than that they were very polite and respectful!

  4. Almost all of my own insecurities came from peers I went all the way thru K-12th grade with.
    We are getting hounded right now b/c we refuse to send our 4 yr old to pre-k. (the more pressure we feel…the more we dig in our heels! 😀 ). By the way….thank you to my guardian angel out there…..I have started receiving all types of home schooling magazines….total coincidence? (hmmmm…I wonder!)

  5. Dennis H. Bennett

    sage: I sent this on to my youngest home-schooling daughter. The language skills of her 5 year old far exceed his peers, hence communication, reading, comprehension are all advanced. Thanks.

  6. Faith Pappano

    I let my first child go to one day at a christian preschool. Christian or not, the school en mass idea is a failure all the way around.No one loves my kids like I do.
    I have had such close intimacy with them and I will always be happy that we stayed together as they grew up rather than saying goodbye in the morning and coming back together for a couple of hours at the end of the day(if that).What an empty existence that would have been.
    People say they cannot homeschool for one reason or another but there is no good reason not to do it. There are many things we did without for many years but we were easily able to live well even though there was one wage earner instead of two. Don’t let the world convice you that you must have both parents working. It’s a big fat lie.

  7. Yeah, the comrade teacher’s goonion morons would love nothing more than to “socialize” every child in America to the point where they are too stoopid to tie their own shoes, or wipe their own behinds, without government help.
    After all, they have been at it for ten decades, and have finally managed to put a fellow-traveling commie in the White House.
    And I bet sage’s crock pot BBQ recipe would be great for beef short ribs – if you browned them first on the stove in a little extra-extra virgin olive oil, then cooked them on low in the crock for about 12-14 hours, and added a few drops of liquid smoke, along with a fair amount (that would be at least 5 cloves) of crushed garlic just before dropping them into the pot. 😀

  8. Reblogged this on Freedom Academy Online and commented:
    Children truly do not get much time for social interaction in schools and the amount of time they are getting is dropping quickly. Home-schooled children get plenty of social time during activities like volunteering and scouts.

  9. I enjoyed reading this post. I was a high school English teacher for ten years and then decided to stay home with my babies after they were born. I’m pretty sure we’re going to homeschool our daughter next year. I have to tell you that I appreciate your perspective about keeping the focus on God. So important! And it’s hard to include God into the classroom. I’m not sure it’s so much self-esteem that’s the main problem; the main issue with traditional schools is that there are just too many students and not enough teachers. Homeschooling changes that ratio dramatically and allows for a lot more freedom to mentor kids (academically, morally, socially, etc).


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