Some Hollyweirdos live so much in fantasy, they confuse real life with the make-belief land of movies.
Here’s another Hollywood drama queen.
Gwyneth Paltrow, who pretentiously called her divorce from British pop singer Chris Martin “conscious uncoupling” (can there be unconscious coupling or unconscious uncoupling?), compared being dissed on Twitter to being in a war.
While appearing at the techy Code Conference in California to promote her bankrupt “lifestyle” brand Goop, Paltrow likened mean twitter comments to the suffering of war, saying, “You come across [online comments] about yourself and about your friends, and it’s a very dehumanizing thing. It’s almost like, how in war, you go through this bloody dehumanizing thing…”
Below is a letter to Goopy Gwyneth from a Green Beret, Bryan Sikes, SFC:
I’d first like to start out by saying how terrible I feel for you and all your friends that on a daily basis have to endure mean words written by people you don’t know. I can only imagine the difficulty of waking up in a 12,000 square foot Hollywood home and having your assistant retrieve your iPhone, only to see that the battery is low and someone on twitter (the social media concept that you and all of your friends contribute to on an hourly basis to feed your ego and narcissistic ways), has written a mean word or 2 about you. You’ve hit the nail on the head, war is exactly like that. You should receive a medal for the burden you have carried on your shoulders due to these meanies on social media.
You said, “Its almost like, how in war, you go through this bloody dehumanizing thing and then something is defined out of it.” I could see how you, and others like you in “the biz”, could be so insecure and mentally weak that you could pair the difficulty of your life on twitter to my brothers who have had their limbs ripped off and seen their friends shot, blown up, burned and disfigured, or wake up every morning in pain – while just starting the day is a challenge. How about our wives? The ones that sign on to be there for us through thick and thin, that help us to shake the hardships of war upon our return? And do all this while being mothers to our kids, keeping bills in order because we are always gone, and keeping our lives glued together. They do all this, by the way, without a team of accountants, nanny’s, personal assistants, and life coaches. Yeah, reading a mean tweet is just like all that.
You know what is really “dehumanizing”, Miss Paltrow? The fact that you’d even consider that your life as an “A-list” celebrity reading internet comments could even compare to war and what is endured on the battlefield. You and the other “A-listers” that think like you are laughable. You all have actually convinced yourselves that you in some way face difficulty on a regular basis. Let me be the first to burst your bubble: a long line at Starbucks, your driver being 3 minutes late, a scuff mark on your $1200 shoes and a mean tweet do not constitute difficulty in the eyes of a soldier.
Understand me when I say this: war does not define me. It is a chapter in my life that helped shaped me. Being a husband and father is what defines me. Remember, sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never…be close to what war is.
Here are some other choice Goopy quotes:
1. “I don’t want to be rich and I don’t want to be famous.”
2. “I am who I am. I can’t pretend to be somebody who makes $25,000 a year.”
3. On taking a retreat to Sedona, Arizona: “I’ll never forget it. I was starting to hike up the red rocks, and honestly, it was as if I heard the rock say: ‘You have the answers. You are your teacher.’”
4. “I love the English way, which is not as capitalistic as it is in America. People don’t talk about work and money; they talk about interesting things at dinner parties. I like living here because I don’t tap into the bad side of American psychology, which is ‘I’m not achieving enough, I’m not making enough, I’m not at the top of the pile.’ It’s just kind of like, I am.”
5. “There’s a portion of the movie where something bad happens to me, and I lose my clothes along the way, so essentially I’m wearing a bra and trousers. There are certain requirements, but luckily I have a good base because I work out often.”
6. “Every woman can make time [to work out] — every woman — and you can do it with your baby in the room. There have been countless times where I’ve worked out with my kids crawling around all over the place. You just make it work.” [New York Daily News]
7. Criticizing people for being upset about 9/11: “I find the English amazing how they got over 7/7. There were no multiple memorials with people sobbing as they would have been in America.”
8. “I would rather die than let my kid eat Cup-a-Soup.” [Conan late night show]
9. “We’re human beings and the sun is the sun—how can it be bad for you? I don’t think anything that’s natural can be bad for you.” (Ever heard of rattlesnakes, Goopy? They’re natural too.)
10. “I’d rather smoke crack than eat cheese from a tin.”
11. “When you go to Paris and your concierge sends you to some restaurant because they get a kickback, it’s like, ‘No. Where should I really be? Where is the great bar with organic wine? Where do I get a bikini wax in Paris?’”
12. “I’m just like any other regular mum; cooking, cleaning, wiping butts, picking up after kids, being a wife and helping the kids with their homework.” (Gwyneth Paltrow has a net worth, separate from Martin’s, rumored to be $140 million.)