Category Archives: Humor

Ted Nugent Rocks

ted

The Motor City Madman gives us twenty really good reasons to vote for Donald Trump.

Via the Conservative Tribune:

Obama is against Trump
The Media is against Trump
The establishment Democrats are against Trump
The establishment Republicans are against Trump
The Pope is against Trump
The UN is against Trump
The EU is against Trump
China is against Trump
Mexico is against Trump
Soros is against Trump
Black Lives Matter is against Trump
MoveOn.Org is against Trump
Koch Bro’s are against Trump
Hateful, racist, violent Liberals are against Trump

Click here to see the last six reasons.

Any one of them works for me.

-Dave

(h/t: The Hermanator)

The Drooling Judge Caption Contest

This is the 128th world-famous FOTM Caption Contest!

Here’s the pic, of Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg dozing off at Obama’s 2015 State of the Union address:

Ruth Bader Ginsburg falls asleep at Obama' SOTU 2015You know the drill:

  • Enter the contest by submitting your caption as a comment on this thread (scroll down until you see the “LEAVE A REPLY” box), not via email or on Facebook.
  • The winner of the Caption Contest will get a gorgeous Award Certificate of Excellence and a year’s free subscription to FOTM:D
  • FOTM writers will vote for the winner.
  • Any captions proffered by FOTM writers, no matter how brilliant (ha ha), will not be considered. :(

To get the contest started, here’s my caption:

Justice Anthony Kennedy ponders:
“To be, or not to be–that is the question:
Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows sitting next to a drooling colleague
Or to take action against her raucous snores
And by waking her, end them.”

This contest will be closed in a week, at the end of next Tuesday, July 19, 2016.

For the winner of our last Caption Contest, go here.

~Eowyn

We have a winner!

. . . for FOTM’s 127th Caption Contest!

These were great captions!

As usual, FOTM‘s writers duly voted, each for what he/she considered to be the best (#1) and second-best (#2) captions. Each #1 vote is worth 4 points; each #2 vote is worth 2 points. Except for the winner and runner-up, the votes were all over the place.

And the winner of FOTM’s 127th Caption Contest, with one #1 vote and two #2 votes, totaling 8 points, is . . .

Snoopy danceDee!

Here’s her winning caption:

fat man in bus luggage compartment

Zorro is in 2nd place, with one #1 and one #2 votes, totaling 6 points. Here’s his caption:

Portrait of a “Speedo Don’t”

christy, chulai1968, Discuss Disgust, and japoa are all in 3rd place, each with one #1 vote and 4 points. Here are their respective captions:

Short bus VIP.

JC Penney’s next male super model…..

My wife told me if I didn’t stop snoring……

At least we know he wasn’t a carry-on

Kevin J Lankford, Lola, and MoFrappy are all in 4th place, each with one #2 vote and 2 points. Here are their respective captions:

That is not what I meant by “put the spare tire in here!

Progressive Voter Sleeper Cell

This is the weirdest vending machine I have ever seen.

Well done, everyone!

Congratulations, Dee!

Here’s your fancy-schmancy Award Certificate of Great Excellence, all ready for framing! LOL

StrawberrydancingbananaCarrotChilliMuffinPurpleBanana PineappledancingbananaCarrotChilliMuffinPineappleStrawberry

award certificate1For all the other caption submissions, go here.

Be here tomorrow for our next very exciting Caption Contest!

Seen any good pics that you think would be great for our Caption Contest? Email them to us! :D

FOTM4ever@gmail.com

~Éowyn

Saturday Funny: This is what Eric thinks of broccoli

~Eowyn

The vacuum won’t start…

A retired guy sits around the house all day so one day his wife says, “Joe, you could do something useful, like vacuum the house once a week.”

The guy gives it a thought and says, “Sure, why not. Where’s the vacuum?”

Half an hour later, the guy comes into the kitchen to get some coffee. His wife says, “I didn’t hear the vacuum running. I though you were going to do the vacuuming?”

Exasperated, Joe answers, “The stupid thing is broken, it won’t start. We need to buy a new one.”

“Really?” asked the wife. She says, “Show me – it worked fine the last time.”

So he did…

h/t Laura!

DCG

Monday Funny!

This is the story of a young female college student flying in a two-seat airplane with just the pilot.

He had a heart attack and died. She, frantic, grabs the mike and calls out a May Day.

“May Day! May Day! Help me! Help me! The pilot had a heart attack and is dead and I don’t know how to fly.”

“Someone help me! Please help me!”

She then hears a voice on the radio saying: “This is Air Traffic Control and I have you loud and clear. I will talk you through this and get you back on the ground. I’ve had a lot of experience with this kind of problem. Now, just take a deep breath, stay calm and everything will be fine!”

“Now give me your height and position.”

She then says, “I’m 5’4″ and I support Hillary.”

87798907

“OK” says the voice on the radio, “Repeat after me: Our Father, Who art in Heaven,”

baby laughing

DCG

Sunday Funny! – Why the Dot?

Hindu dot

For centuries, Hindu women have worn a dot on their foreheads.

Most of us naively think the dot to be connected with marriage or religion, but the Indian Embassy in Washington, D.C. recently revealed the true story.

When a Hindu woman gets married, she brings a dowry into the union. On her wedding night, the husband scratches off the dot to see whether he has won a convenience store, a gas station, a doughnut shop, or a motel in the United States.

If nothing is there, he must take a job in India answering telephones giving technical advice.

H/t FOTM‘s josephbc69

~Eowyn