Unlike special snowflakes, us cons have a sense of humor. I have no doubt that I will not offend anyone here. Enjoy!
You might be a Redneck if:
- You ever cut your grass and found a car.
- Your stereo speakers used to belong to the Drive-in Theater.
- Your mother has “ammo” on her Christmas list.
- There are more than five McDonald’s bags in your car.
- The taillight covers of your car are made of red tape.
- You’ve ever been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.
- People hear your car a long time before they see it.
- Your wife’s hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan.
- More than one living relative is named after a southern Civil War general.
- Your only condiment on the dining room table is the economy size bottle of ketchup.
- You think that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.
- You know of at least six different ways to bend the bill of a baseball hat.
- You have flowers planted in a bathroom appliance in your front yard.
- You’ve been on TV more than 5 times describing the sound of a tornado.
- You have spent more on your pickup truck than on your education.
- You have a color coordinating rope that ties down your car hood.