Which former Republican senator thinks Obama is groovy and peachy and just way smarter than anyone alive?
The correct answer is “Alan Simpson”.
On August 5, 2011, referring to Obama’s debt ceiling negotiation with the Congressional Republicans, Simpson said in an interview with the Denver Post: “This guy is a little bit smarter than some of the guys who are trying to hammer him. They ought to give it up.”
Alan Simpson, a U. S. Senator from Wyoming for 18 years (1979-1997), was born with a silver spoon in his mouth. Alan’s dad was Milward Simpson, a former Governor of Wyoming (1955–1959) as well as a U.S. Senator from Wyoming (1962–1967) who voted against the Civil Rights Act of 1964.
Sen. Alan Simpson has been an outspoken advocate for access to abortion, calling the killing of tiny defenseless babies “the precious right of privacy”. He supports gay and lesbian rights, and is openly critical of the military’s “Don’t ask, don’t tell” policy.
In 2010, Obama appointed good ol’ Alan to co-chair the useless bipartisan deficit reduction group, the National Commission on Fiscal Responsibility and Reform.
When the commission issued its draft proposals to help erase the federal government’s then-$13.8 trillion debt — proposals that included raising the Social Security retirement age from 65 to 69 to bring in $1 trillion more in tax revenue — liberals and conservatives alike reacted with strong opposition. That prompted Simpson to whine to Wyoming’s Trib.com:
“I’ve never had any nastier mail or [been in a] more difficult position in my life. Just vicious. People I’ve known, relatives [saying], ‘You son of a bitch. How could you do this?’ We had the greatest generation — I think this is the greediest generation.”
Then Simpson poured oil on the fire he’d lit. In a letter responding to criticisms by a group representing older women, Simpson called Social Security “a milk cow with 310 million tits.” (You can read his e-mail here.)
That prompted this response from an anonymous farmer in Montana — a response that has gone viral:
“Hey Alan, let’s get a few things straight.
1. As a career politician, you have been on the public tit for FIFTY YEARS.
2. I have been paying Social Security taxes for 48 YEARS (since I was 15 Years old. I am now 63).
3 My Social Security payments, and those of millions of other Americans, were safely tucked away in an interest bearing account for decades until you political pukes decided to raid the account and give OUR money to a bunch of zero ambition losers in return for votes, thus bankrupting the system and turning Social Security into a Ponzi scheme that would have made Bernie Madoff proud.
4. Recently, just like Lucy & Charlie Brown, you and your ilk pulled the proverbial football away from millions of American seniors nearing retirement and moved the goalposts for full retirement from age 65 to Age 67. NOW, you and your shill commission are proposing to move the goalposts YET AGAIN.
5. I, and millions of other Americans, have been paying into Medicare from Day One, and now you morons propose to change the rules of the game. Why? Because you idiots mismanaged other parts of the economy to such an extent that you need to steal money from Medicare to pay the bills.
6. I, and millions of other Americans, have been paying income taxes our entire lives, and now you propose to increase our taxes yet again. Why? Because you incompetent bastards spent our money so profligately that you just kept on spending even after you ran out of money. Now, you come to the American taxpayers and say you need more to pay off YOUR debt.
To add insult to injury, you label us “greedy” for calling “bullshit” on your incompetence. Well, Captain Bullshit, I have a few questions for YOU:
1. How much money have you earned from the American taxpayers during your pathetic 50-year political career?
2. At what age did you retire from your pathetic political career, and how much are you receiving in annual retirement benefits from the American taxpayers?
3. How much do you pay for YOUR government provided health insurance?
4. What cuts in YOUR retirement and healthcare benefits are you proposing in your disgusting deficit reduction proposal, or, as usual, have you exempted yourself and your political cronies?
It is you, Captain Bullshit, and your political co-conspirators called Congress who are the “greedy” ones. It is you and your fellow nutcases who have bankrupted America and stolen the American dream from millions of loyal, patriotic taxpayers. And for what? Votes. That’s right, sir. You and yours have bankrupted America for the sole purpose of advancing your pathetic political careers. You know it, we know it, and you know that we know it.
And you can take that to the bank, you miserable ASS.”
In his youth, Alan Simpson was a juvenile delinquent.
In high school, Simpson and some friends “went out to do damage” and torched an abandoned federal government war relocation structure, a crime now punishable by up to 20 years in prison. The gang also went shooting in their community, firing their 22 caliber rifles at mailboxes, blowing holes in several and killing a cow.
Simpson pled guilty to destroying government property and got two years of probation. Simpson’s words to the Court were “I was a monster.” [Source: Wikipedia]
Earth to Alan Simpson: You’re still a monster.