Saturday funnies!

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DCG

Saturday Morning Truisms.

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Most of my generation were HOME SCHOOLED in many ways.

1.. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE
“If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.”

2.. My mother taught me RELIGION
“You better pray that will come out of the carpet.”

3.. My father taught me about TIME TRAVEL
“If you don’t straighten up, I’m going to knock you into the middle of next week!”

4.. My father taught me LOGIC
“Because I said so, that’s why.”

5.. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC
“If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you’re not going to the store with me.”

6.. My mother taught me FORESIGHT .
“Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you’re in an accident.”

7.. My father taught me IRONY
“Keep crying, and I’ll give you something to cry about.”

8.. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS
“Shut your mouth and eat your supper.”

9.. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM
“Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!”

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA
“You’ll sit there until all that spinach is gone.”

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER
“This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.”

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY
“If I told you once, I’ve told you a million times. Don’t exaggerate!”

13. My father taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE
“I brought you into this world, and I can take you out of it.”

14.. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION
“Stop acting like your father!”

15. My mother taught me about ENVY
“There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don’t have wonderful parents like you do.”

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION
“Just wait until we get home.”

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING
“You are going to get it from your father when you get home!”

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE
“If you don’t stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way.”

19. My mother taught me ESP
“Put your sweater on; don’t you think I know when you are cold?”

20. My father taught me HUMOR
“When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me.”

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT
“If you don’t eat your vegetables, you’ll never grow up.”

22. My mother taught me GENETICS
“You’re just like your father.”

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS
“Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?”

24. My mother taught me WISDOM
“When you get to be my age, you’ll understand.

25. My father taught me about JUSTICE
“One day you’ll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you !”
*******************************
Quote of the day:  “Faith is not about everything turning out ok. It’s about being ok, no matter how things turn out.”

~Steve~                                            H/T Hujonwi

Music for Good Friday night

Psalm 51, set to music by Italian composer Gregorio Allegri in the 1630s as “Miserere Mei, Deus (Have mercy on me, O God),” hauntingly sung by the choral group, The Sixteen.

Psalm 51

Have mercy on me, O God, in your goodness;
in the greatness of your compassion
wipe out my offense.
Thoroughly wash me from my guilt
and of my sin cleanse me.

For I acknowledge my offense,
and my sin is before me always:
“Against you only have I sinned,
and done what is evil in your sight.”

A clean heart create for me, O God,
and a steadfast spirit renew within me.
Cast me not out from your presence,
and your Holy Spirit take not from me.

Give me back the joy of your salvation,
and a willing spirit sustain in me.
O Lord, open my lips,
and my mouth shall proclaim your praise.

H/t friend of FOTM, Patriot USA

~Eowyn

Woman who supports killing babies washes feet of lawbreaker

Pelosi

“To honor the dignity and work of [illegal] immigrants,” the Catholic heretic, House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi (D-SF), helps Bishop Marc Andrus in the traditional foot-washing ceremony by pouring water on the feet of Yamile Cruz, 10, at Saint John the Evangelist Episcopal Church in San Francisco.

Pelosi used the occasion to propagandize about HR15 – the bipartisan immigration “reform” bill that she claims would “reduce the deficit by nearly $1 trillion, secure our borders, unite our families, protect our workers and provide an earned pathway to citizenship.”

One of the richest members of Congress, the pro-abort Pelosi has a net worth estimated to be $100 million.

The Magisterium of the Roman Catholic Church identifies abortion (and the support of abortion) to be an “intrinsic (i.e., unnegotiable) evil” and mortal sin. Shame on you, Bishop Andrus, for allowing this heretic to mock Christ and the Church by continuing to receive the sacred sacrament of the Eucharist.

~Eowyn

Obama’s IRS plotted to imprison conservatives

While it is proper for the federal government to use the judicial system to go after tax cheats, it is ENTIRELY improper for the government to SELECTIVELY go after suspected tax cheats on a partisan basis.

That is what Obama and his IRS are doing, which the nonpartisan citizen watchdog group Judicial Watch has discovered from emails of former IRS official Lois Lerner, but only after filing repeated Freedom of Information Act (FOIA) lawsuits.

Those emails also show that:

  • Lois Lerner knew full well the IRS was — and still is — targeting conservative groups, esp. Tea Party groups, for extra scrutiny.
  • Lerner knew full well that singling out conservative groups for prosecution is not lawful or in her euphemistic words, “not realistic under current law.”
  • Lerner was scapegoating when she blamed the targeting of conservative groups on “low level” IRS workers in Cincinnati.
  • Not only is the IRS complicit, Eric Holder’s Department of (in)Justice is also complicit, because Lerner was plotting with DOJ on how to prosecute conservative groups for alleged tax violation.

~Eowyn

Eye of ObamaJW Obtains IRS Documents Showing Lerner in Contact With DOJ about Potential Prosecution of Tax-Exempt Groups

APRIL 16, 2014

May 9, 2013, email reveals IRS plans to meet with Department of Justice over whether to prosecute groups that “lied” about plans for political activity 

(Washington, DC) – Judicial Watch today released a new batch of internal IRS documents revealing that former IRS official Lois Lerner communicated with the Department of Justice (DOJ) about whether it was possible to criminally prosecute certain tax-exempt entities. The documents were obtained as a result of an October 2013 Judicial Watch Freedom of Information Act (FOIA) lawsuit filed against the Internal Revenue Service (IRS) after the agency refused to respond to four FOIA requests dating back to May 2013.

Lois Lerner

Lois Lerner

The newly released IRS documents contain an email exchange between Lerner and Nikole C. Flax, then-Chief of Staff to then-Acting IRS Commissioner Steven T. Miller discussing plans to work with the DOJ  to prosecute nonprofit groups that “lied” (Lerner’s quotation marks) about political activities. The exchange includes the following:

I got a call today from Richard Pilger Director Elections Crimes Branch at DOJ … He wanted to know who at IRS the DOJ folk s [sic] could talk to about Sen. Whitehouse idea at the hearing that DOJ could piece together false statement cases about applicants who “lied” on their 1024s –saying they weren’t planning on doing political activity, and then turning around and making large visible political expenditures. DOJ is feeling like it needs to respond, but want to talk to the right folks at IRS to see whether there are impediments from our side and what, if any damage this might do to IRS programs.

I told him that sounded like we might need several folks from IRS…

I think we should do it – also need to include CI [Criminal Investigation Division], which we can help coordinate. Also, we need to reach out to FEC. Does it make sense to consider including them in this or keep it separate?

Lerner then “handed off” scheduling the issue to Senior Technical Adviser, Attorney Nancy Marks, who was then supposed to set up the meeting with the DOJ.  Lerner also decided that it would be DOJ’s decision as to whether representatives from the Federal Election Commission would attend.

Democratic Rhode Island Senator Sheldon Whitehouse had held a hearing on April 9 during which, “in questioning the witnesses from DOJ and IRS, Whitehouse asked why they have not prosecuted 501(c)(4) groups that have seemingly made false statements about their political activities.”  Lerner described the impetus for this hearing in a March 27, 2013, email to top IRS staff:

As I mentioned yesterday — there are several groups of folks from the FEC world that are pushing tax fraud prosecution for c4s who report they are not conducting political activity when they are (or these folks think they are). One is my ex-boss Larry Noble (former General Counsel at the FEC), who is now president of Americans for Campaign Reform. This is their latest push to shut these down. One IRS prosecution would make an impact and they wouldn’t feel so comfortable doing the stuff.

So, don’t be fooled about how this is being articulated – it is ALL about 501(c)(4) orgs and political activity

But in an email sent a few minutes earlier, Lerner acknowledged prosecutions would evidently be at odds with the law:

Whether there was a false statement or fraud regarding an [sic] description of an alleged political expenditure that doesn’t say vote for or vote against is not realistic under current law. Everyone is looking for a magic bullet or scapegoat — there isn’t one. The law in this area is just hard.

The documents also include email exchanges showing that before Lerner’s May 10, 2013, speech to the American Bar Association blaming “low-level” employees in Cincinnati for targeting tax-exempt organizations, the IRS Exempt Organizations division was scrambling to defuse the emerging targeting scandal:

  • May 1, 2013: After receiving an email from an assistant showing that 501(c)(4) applications had increased from 1591 in 2010 to 3398 in 2012 , Lerner wrote back, “Looks to me like 2010-2012 doubled too. Oh well – thanks.”
  • May 2, 2013: Discussing an upcoming conference call with approximately 100 congressional staffers on May 22, Lerner cautions aides, “Need to be careful not to mention sequester/furlough unless asked although can allude to budget and resources restraints.”
  • May 2, 2013: In response to an email reminding her about the upcoming conference call with congressional staffers, Lerner responded, “Arrgh – I just saw it. Sharon [White] could skate, but Cindy [Thomas] is the person who could answer that stuff. We need to give them some type of language in the event that type of question comes up” [apparently in reference to earlier email referencing “sensitive issues”].

The new documents obtained by Judicial Watch also include emails exchanged after Lerner’s May 10 ABA speech:

  • May 10, 2013: In an email to an aide responding to a request for information from a Washington Post reporter, Lerner admits that she “can’t confirm that there was anyone on the other side of the political spectrum” who had been targeted by the IRS. She then adds that “The one with the names used were only know [sic] because they have been very loud in the press.”
  • May 15, 2013: In an email from an aide to Lerner, the aide specifically mentions “Tea Party Organizations, the “Tea Party movement,” and “Tea Party Patriots” as organizations targeted by the IRS.

The Judicial Watch FOIA requests came on the heels of an explosive May 14, 2013, Treasury Inspector General report revealing that the IRS had singled out groups with conservative-sounding terms such as “patriot” and “Tea Party” in their titles when applying for tax-exempt status. The IG probe determined that “Early in Calendar Year 2010, the IRS began using inappropriate criteria to identify organizations applying for tax-exempt status to (e.g., lists of past and future donors).” According to the report, the illegal IRS reviews continued for more than 18 months and “delayed processing of targeted groups’ applications” preparing for the 2012 presidential election.

Lerner, who headed the IRS division that handles applications for tax-exempt status, refused to testify at a May 2013 hearing before Rep. Darrell Issa’s (R-CA) House Oversight Committee, demanding immunity concerning her role in the targeting scandal. Lerner retired from the IRS with full benefits on September 23 after an internal investigation found she was guilty of “neglect of duties” and was going to call for her ouster, according to news reports. On April 9, 2014, the Ways and Means Committee referred Lois Lerner to the DOJ for criminal prosecution. On April 10, 2014, the House Oversight Committee voted to hold Lerner in contempt of Congress.

“These new emails show that the day before she broke the news of the IRS scandal, Lois Lerner was talking to a top Obama Justice Department official about whether the DOJ could prosecute the very same organizations that the IRS had already improperly targeted,” said Judicial Watch President Tom Fitton. “The IRS emails show Eric Holder’s Department of Justice is now implicated and conflicted in the IRS scandal.  No wonder we had to sue in federal court to get these documents.”

Obama’s Roundup

Thank you Maui Jim for pointing out this video. ~ Trail Dust

Obama’s Great American Roundup

Your tax dollars at work.

Planning your future

Which “Lord of the Rings” character are you?

Lord of the RingsAre you a Frodo Baggins?

Or Aragorn, aka Strider?

Or the faithful Samwise Gamgee?

Or the super-competent Elf warrior, Legolas Greenleaf?

Or Éowyn, shieldmaiden of Rohan?

Or Treebeard the Ent?

Or Gollum, who once was Smeagol?

Or (I hope not!) the dark lord Sauron?

Take this 13-question quiz to find out! Click here!

P.S. I’m Gandalf. LOL

Your various eccentricities tend to amuse as often as they perplex, but your silly, warm-hearted exterior masks a shrewd and powerful tactician. All of Mordor couldn’t turn you evil, which the rest of the world better be grateful for, because let’s be honest: You’d be awesome at being evil.

~Eowyn