Category Archives: Humor

We have a winner!

. . . for FOTM’s 116th Caption Contest!

We have a clear winner for this contest. :D

As usual, FOTM‘s writers duly voted, each for what he/she considered to be the best (#1) and second-best (#2) captions. Each #1 vote is worth 3 points; each #2 vote is worth 2 points.

And the winner of FOTM’s 116th Caption Contest, with five #1 votes, totaling 15 points, is . . .

Snoopy danceKevin J Lankford!

Here is his winning caption:

dutchmen in miniskirts protest Muslim sex assaults, Amsterdam, Jan. 16, 2016

lahthoughts is in 2nd place, with one #1 vote and one #2 vote, totaling 5 points. Here’s his caption:

We pee sitting down too…….

Scott M. is in 3rd place, with two #2 votes, totaling 4 points. Here’s his caption:

“And next week we are all going to wear Goat heads”

Helene Pineau, Lou D’amico and MomOfIV are all in 4th place, each with one #2 vote and 2 points. Here are their respective captions:

Dutch courage.

“We were supposed to wear panties too?” “Damn it, no wonder I’m cold!”

manhood has left the building

Well done, everyone!

Congratulations, Kevin J Lankford!

Here’s your fancy-schmancy Award Certificate of Great Excellence, all ready for framing! LOL

StrawberrydancingbananaCarrotChilliMuffinPurpleBanana PineappledancingbananaCarrotChilliMuffinPineappleStrawberry

award certificate1

For all the other caption submissions, go here.

Be here tomorrow for our next very exciting Caption Contest!

Seen any good pics that you think would be great for our Caption Contest? Email them to us! :D


Why I keep my desk so clean

And then, there’s this incorrigible kitty:


Friday Funny: How to save Social Security

H/t FOTM’s josephbc69


Saturday Unfunnies: Hillary for 2016

Send this post to your Democrat family and friends!


H/t FOTM’s maziel


A Solution To Intrusive Drones

Drone, it's the new Skeet

Drone, it’s the new Skeet

The law is still very fuzzy on the safety and privacy issues associated with drones

So while the subject remains unsettled, please allow me to suggest one humorous answer. If a drone strays onto private property, like over a swimming pool or near a window, it should be considered a SKEET, and on presentation of its parts to local authorities, a bounty should be paid to the shooter.

When the drone’s owner arrives to claim drone parts, the owner may retrieve the fallen drone by paying a sum matching the bounty paid to the shooter.

Does this sound like a good idea?

PS: Of course, it is NOT a good idea. I am just trying to inject a little humor into the morning. But the availability of drones to a broad number of people will certainly become a problem to safety, privacy and even “homeland” security.

Interesting facts about bats!

Our planet is populated with plenty of bizarre and astonishing creatures.

Did you know this about bats? The latest newsletter from Texas Gardener Seeds has these interesting facts about bats:

  1. Bats consume 3,000 or more mosquitoes and other insects nightly.
  2. Bats are responsible for up to 95% of the seed dispersal essential to the regeneration of forests.
  3. Bats are less likely to be rabid than dogs are.

So put up a bat house to encourage the presence of these shy animals!

Here are three from the Bat Family:


Sucker-Footed Bat


Red-Winged Fruit Bat


Left-Winged Ding Bat

So 2 out of 3 bats have a useful purpose!

If we could just train him to eat mosquitoes . . . or do anything useful.


There is one bat — a most destructive variety of the Left-Winged Ding Bat.


The Vampire Bat

H/t FOTM‘s maziel!


Here’s our first Eurotrash Caption Contest!

This is the 116th world famous FOTM Caption Contest!

Here’s the pic:

dutchmen in miniskirts protest Muslim sex assaults, Amsterdam, Jan. 16, 2016

The pic above — of men in miniskirts to show their “solidarity” with hundreds of German women who were sexually assaulted by Muslim men on New Year’s Eve in Cologne — was taken in Amsterdam, Netherlands, on Jan. 16, 2016.

You know the drill:

  • Enter the contest by submitting your caption as a comment on this thread (scroll down until you see the “LEAVE A REPLY” box), not via email or on Facebook.
  • The winner of the Caption Contest will get a gorgeous Award Certificate of Excellence and a year’s free subscription to FOTM:D
  • FOTM writers will vote for the winner.
  • Any captions proffered by FOTM writers, no matter how brilliant (ha ha), will not be considered. :(

To get the contest going, here’s my caption:

“Imam Abdallah Al-Khalif recommends sodomy to widen Muslim men’s anus for jihad. We’ll gladly widen our anus for jihadists!”

This contest will be closed in a week, at the end of next Tuesday, Feb. 2, 2016.

For the winner of our last Caption Contest, click here.

Seen any pics that you think will make good fodder for our caption contests? Send it to us at:

Thank you!