Category Archives: Humor

Monday Funny: The faith healers

When I heard Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson were guest preachers at a nearby black Houston church, I decided to check them out in person and see what it was all about.

I sat down and Sharpton came up to me. I don’t know why, maybe it was because I was the only white person in the church. He laid his hands on my hand and loudly proclaimed: “By the will of Jesus the Lord Almighty, and the will of God, you will walk today!”

I told him I was not paralyzed.

Then Jesse Jackson came by and thundered: “By the Grace of God, and his Son Jesus, you will walk today!”

Again, I told him there is nothing wrong with me.

After the sermon, I stepped outside and, Lo and Behold, I did walk that day!

My car had been stolen.

H/t FOTM’s maziel

reverends-from-hell

~Éowyn

You don’t want to miss this Caption Contest!

This is the 103rd world-famous FOTM Caption Contest!

Here’s the pic.

Berkeley tree huggers1

About the pic: Greenies protest a proposed wildfire-prevention tree-clearing program by stripping naked and hugging eucalyptus trees on the U.C. Berkeley campus, July 18, 2015. See “Berkeley tree-huggers go naked“.

You know the drill:

  • Enter the contest by submitting your caption as a comment on this thread (scroll down until you see the “LEAVE A REPLY” box), not via email or on Facebook.
  • The winner of the Caption Contest will get a gorgeous Award Certificate of Excellence and a year’s free subscription to FOTM! :D
  • FOTM writers will vote for the winner.
  • Any captions proffered by FOTM writers, no matter how brilliant (ha ha), will not be considered. :(

To get the contest going, here’s my caption:

Eucalyptus trees: “Aack! Yuck! Eww! We need a shower!”

This contest will be closed in a week, at the end of next Tuesday, Aug. 4, 2015.

For the winner of our last Caption Contest, click here.

Seen any pics that you think will make good fodder for our caption contests? Send it to us at:

fellowshipminds@gmail.com

Thank you!

~Éowyn

We have a winner!

. . . for FOTM’s 102nd Caption Contest!

This was a great contest, with many clever submissions!

FOTM writers voted, each for what he/she considered to be the best (#1) and second-best (#2) captions. Each #1 vote is worth 3 points; each #2 vote is worth 2 points.

And the winner of FOTM’s 102nd Caption Contest, with two #1 votes and one #2 vote, totaling 8 points is . . .

MomOfIV! Snoopy dance

Here’s her winning caption:

car with dolls

chulai1968 is in 2nd place, with two #1 votes, totaling 6 points. Here’s his caption:

Planned Parenthood float in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade…. just add ketchup.

LAH and Jim are both in 3rd place, each with one #1 vote and 3 points. Here are their respective captions:

You can’t shift gears if you are stuck on stupid.

yeah. well, parts is parts….all I do is deliver ’em……….

CalGirl, Glenn47, Holly Smith, Lola and lou damico are all in 4th place, each with one #2 vote and 2 points. Here are their respective captions:

Obama on border security: What human smuggling?

Illegals will change themselves into anything to get over that border. No one will notice.

Found! 561 of Obama’s electronic voters.

Planned Parenthood now offers mobile services.

All dolled up and no place to go.

Well done, everyone!

Congratulations, MomOfIV!

Here’s your fancy-schmancy Award Certificate of Great Excellence, all ready for framing! LOL

StrawberrydancingbananaCarrotChilliMuffinPurpleBanana PineappledancingbananaCarrotChilliMuffinPineappleStrawberry

award certificate1

For all the other caption submissions, go here.

Be here tomorrow for our next very exciting caption contest!

Seen any good pics that you think would be great for our Caption Contest? Email them to us! :D

fellowshipminds@gmail.com

~Éowyn

How your dog can look like Donald Trump

Here’s a follow-up to “How your cat can look like Donald Trump“. LOL

Trump dogTrump dog5Trump dog1Trump dog2Trump dog4Trump dog5Trump dog6Trump dog7Trump dog8Trump dog9Trump dog10Trump dog11Trump dog12Trump dog13Trump dog15Trumpdog

Here’s my favorite! Ingenious! LOL

Trump dog4

And here’s a bonus Trump cat, from reader M.N.:

Michelle N's Trump cat

H/t FOTM’s CSM and Elite Daily

~Eowyn

How your cat can look like Donald Trump

Donald Trump catDonald Trump cat1Trump cat1Trump cat5Trump catTrump cat2Trump cat3Trump cat4Trump cat6Trump cat7Trump Gaby

Send your cat’s Trump photo to us and we’ll post it!

fellowshipminds@gmail.com

H/t FOTM’s CSM

~Éowyn

Berkeley tree-huggers go naked

A group of Berkeleyans fulfilled every stereotype of the woo-woo Left by hugging eucalyptus trees with their clothes off, to protest a proposed tree-clearing program to prevent wildfire.

Tracey Taylor reports for Berkeleyside that an estimated 50-75 people took part in a staged protest on Saturday, July 18, 2015, at a eucalyptus grove on the UC Berkeley campus, many of them stripping naked in doing so, to make clear their opposition to a proposed FEMA-funded tree-clearing program in the East Bay hills.

The event was orchestrated by the Tree Spirit Project whose mission is “to raise awareness of the critical role trees play in our lives, both globally and personally.” Jack Gescheidt, who founded the project, does this partly by taking fine-art photographs of people, often naked, communing with trees and nature.

On Saturday, at around 10 a.m., Gescheidt came to an area of the Cal campus with a six-man crew, according to Ted Friedman who took the photographs published here. Gescheidt gave a “stirring talk” defending the eucalyptus trees, which he said have been wrongly identified as a fire risk. He then directed the volunteers who had shown up to pose artfully against the large trees. Then many of the volunteers stripped off and resumed their poses for photographs to be taken. The shoot took about two hours.

Eye Bleach Alert!

What’s seen can never  be unseen!

You were warned. So if you choose to proceed, don’t complain later.

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Berkeley tree huggers2Berkeley tree huggers1

The Federal Emergency Management Agency in March allocated $5.7 million to the California Office of Emergency Services to remove eucalyptus trees as part of fire hazard abatement in Claremont Canyon — scene of a devastating wildfire in 1991 — and other nearby areas, such as Tilden Park and Sibley Volcanic Regional Preserve. The funds will be distributed to UC Berkeley, the city of Oakland, and the East Bay Regional Parks District (EBRPD).

The fire that took hold on Oct. 20, 1991 spread across 1,520 acres, incinerating more than 3,300 homes at an average rate of 11 seconds each and, ultimately, injuring 150 people and leaving 25 dead.

The Tree Spirit Project has joined other campaigners who oppose what they say is unnecessary and harmful “clear-cutting.” The Hills Conservation Network (HCN) group is suing FEMA in federal court. It says the clearing of trees will increase rather than decrease fire danger by turning fire-resistant living trees into dead wood left onsite. It is also protesting the potential use of the herbicide Glyphosate, commercially known as Round Up, on the remaining tree stumps after the clearing.

However, another group of hills residents opposes the FEMA decision for the opposite reason: they say the fire mitigation plan doesn’t go far enough. The Claremont Canyon Conservancy (CCC) supports complete eradication. Jon Kaufman, stewardship coordinator of the 500-strong group, said earlier this year: “The problem today is eucalyptuses crowd out native trees, leaving a dense eucalyptus forest with oaks and bays underneath, starved for sunlight.”

Why is it that only the Left protest by going naked? Is it exhibitionism, which they fancifully rationalize as their bold “subversion” of “middle-class” American culture? See:

~Éowyn

Tuesday Funny! – new Wizard of Oz

Wizard of Oz

H/t FOTM’s dee

On a more serious note, see “The Occult Roots of the Wizard of Oz“.

~Éowyn