Hordes of randy Republicans were expected to be a boon for Tampa’s many strips clubs…
but owners and dancers are still waiting for their RNC stimulus package!
New York Daily News: The wildly anticipated Republican nudie-bar bonanza has turned out to be a double D-sized bust. Strippers across this mammary mecca were anticipating an orgy of business this week from the crush of conventioneers.
Instead, three days into the RNC, Tampa’s dancing beauties were still waiting for their stimulus packages.
“My friend told me I’d make $3,000 a night this week,” said a slinky brunette named Jordan, as she gazed dejectedly around an empty Mons Venus bar on Monday, the Isaac washout day in Tampa. “I’ve made $100 tonight and it’s already 3 a.m. I don’t even know what I’m still doing here,” she added. “This sucks.“
The scene was no different at 2001 Odyssey, located just across the street, where some strippers were dealing with their own personal deficit crises. A dancer named Sicily said she was actually down more than $100 after working Friday, Sunday and Tuesday. Strippers at 2001 Odyssey pay a stage fee every night — and Sicily said the club raised it from $50 to $100 this week. “I wish I was going home with one dollar in my pocket,” Sicily said. “That’s sad.”
Warren Colazzo, owner of Thee Dollhouse, had predicted that the convention haul would triple the cash brought in during previous Super Bowls hosted in Tampa. But between 1 a.m. and 2 a.m. Wednesday, his sleek club drew only one extremely drunk conventioneer in an ill-fitting suit who was seen being reprimanded by a burly security guard.
A pair of cocktail waitresses, in skin-tight American flag corsets and barely-there blue thongs, looked bored. Asked how her week has been, Karen Kennard, an ample-chested blonde, broke into a pained smile. “Hashtag 2012 RNC money myth,” quipped Kennard. “I’ve worked four Super Bowls. I was hoping to be inundated financially in Super Bowl proportions, but it definitely hasn’t happened yet.“
Not all of the delegates have acted like choir boys, of course. A smattering of randy Republicans have mixed canoodling with conventioneering. A portly delegate in a white button-down shirt and khaki pants showed up at 2001 Odyssey Monday night still wearing his convention credentials.
Every five minutes or so, he disappeared into a back room to get a lap dance. “That guy can’t get enough,” one stripper remarked.
An hour or so later, a politico in a blue blazer emerged from the private VIP area tailed closely by a busty brunette. He made a beeline for the club’s ATM machine and pulled out $400 before walking back out, his hand on the small of her back.
Monica Fox, a stripper at Mons Venus, said a pair of GOP bigwigs stopped by Monday afternoon — and one of them treated her like royalty. “He had money, and he had no problem spending it,” Fox said.
But she was one of the very lucky ones. At 4 a.m. Wednesday, a heavily tattooed stripper named Anna surveyed the scene at 2001 Odyssey — where a gaggle of girls were jostling for the attention of three guys in suits — and offered her take on why business was so bad. “To be honest, I think a lot of them just hired escorts,” she said. “That’s more their style.”
Ha, maybe these gals will have more luck at the Democratic National Convention. I’m sure Clinton, Gore, Weiner, et al. can’t wait to provide some “stimulus” to the economy!