If Jeff Foxworthy Took On Muslim Terrorists.

Hey, He says it's funny. So lighten up.

1. You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to liquor.

You may be a Muslim

2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can’t afford shoes.

You may be a Muslim

3. You have more wives than teeth.

You may be a Muslim

4. You wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider bacon unclean.

You may be a Muslim

5. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.

You may be a Muslim

6. You can’t think of anyone you haven’t declared Jihad against.

You may be a Muslim

7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.

You may be a Muslim

8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.

You may be a Muslim

9. You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least four.

You may be a Muslim

10. Your cousin is president of the United States .

You may be a Muslim

~Steve~       H/T  igor

36 responses to “If Jeff Foxworthy Took On Muslim Terrorists.

  1. ROFLMAO!!!!!

    • thanks for the laugh Steve,now that I have my screen cleaned up,I really wasn’t ready for the last one!!!lol I could add quite a bit,but I probably better not.

  2. Yes…Seriously Maxim!!

    I have a new found respect for Jeff Foxworthy!!!

    If I may…Let me add one more truism to that list…while Muslim men deny their women the most basic freedoms…strangely, the one thing they will tolerate, is a woman working – I rarely see Muslim men out there holding down jobs…but I do see lots of the women!!!! But.. apparently THAT’S ok….

  3. ROFL.

    -Dave

  4. Laugh? Haven’t stopped.

    I do hope this doesn’t end his career.

  5. my dad emailed me the above Jeff Foxworthty piece and i forwarded it on to steve I figured everyone could use a good laugh. especially with the horrible way obama is ruining (running) the country.

  6. funny stuff!

  7. These would be even funnier if they weren’t true!

  8. Jeff Foxworthy is an ignorant ass. He has made his living off of making fun of various stereotypes of people around the world, and people who are fearful of anything that is not white, buy it. Sad.

    • Maggie, you’re the ignorant racist ass.
      My proof? Here’s Jeff Foxworthy making fun of rednecks.

      Since you’re an ignoramus, let me make this clear:

      Foxworthy makes fun of rednecks.
      Rednecks are “white”
      White Foxworthy makes fun of whites.
      Therefore, neither Foxworthy nor his audience are racist.

      Your problem, Maggie, is that you’ve been brainwashed by Political Correctness. You are also humor-challenged. But then it does take intelligence to laugh at jokes and, sadly, a jackass has a higher IQ than you.

  9. Change the word, “Muslim” to “Baptist” or “Catholic” or Jewish” or “Lutheran”, etc. & you will see that an entire religious group is being labled due to some extremists. But maybe, that’s the point… The joke should not read, “You might be a muslim, rather a terrorist. And per snopes.com, Jeff Foxworthy is not connected to this “mean” humor nor other types like it. In the “redneck” jokes, we realize we are all rednecks in one or more ways.

    • Muslim-appeasing liberals are always so cranky!

      • Libs ARE cranky…stuck in traffic tonite w/windows rolled down, listening to Hannity. Some woman screams at me, “Sean Hannity. You b*tch!”

        Lovely traffic talk, uh? sigh…

      • I haven’t told any Jew jokes this week–am I “appeasing” the Jews?

        • Okay, Steve–I haven’t told any *Christian* jokes today, either. Or have you forgotten Deuteronomy 17?

          Fact of the matter is, I know tons of Christians, none of whom want to stone the nonChristians. I know tons of Muslims, none of whom want to take over the world.

          But hey–I was just saying that Jeff Foxworthy is funny, and this isn’t. Not because of religion or politics, but because of humor (or rather, the lack of it).

          I hope you have a good day. Watch some Jeff Foxworthy. That guy’s funny.

    • LOL

      Way to go, Steve! :D

  10. It is worth pointing out that Jeff Foxworthy didn’t come up with this. First clue is that Jeff makes fun of rednecks (amongst whom he includes himself). Second clue is that Jeff Foxworthy is funny.

  11. Steve, you assume a lot based on a little. Based on your enjoyment of this, I might recommend that you extract your head from wherever it’s currently situated, but knowing neither you nor your politics (as you don’t know mine), I’m content to accept that tastes differ, rather than making a personal attack.

  12. I know where your head is at Ken,you need a glass belly button-lighten up Steve was joking**

  13. snopes. that is all that needs saying. this is made up, puts words in the mouth of someone that said something ACTUALLY funny (because he used humor on something he related to, laughed at by people who identified with it, as opposed to nastiness laughed at by people not only not muslim but who probably couldn’t say a sentence about what the muslim religion is about. isn’t it hilarious to laugh about something that puts down something we don’t know anything about so that we all feel like we are very special? laugh on, bastards

  14. The whole world needs to chill and get off their I’m offended crap. Here’s the hint. Its a joke! It’s humor! There is no offense if it’s not true to you. If it’s true. Then you have something desparately wrong with you. Chill. laugh at ourselves. Ease the tension. go after the human rights violators, not the frikin comedians ! geez

  15. wow this is from 2 years ago and nothing has changed america is still run by corrupt idiots and

  16. This isn’t funny..I find it offensive

  17. Darcy, then if you find it offensive, I guess since we must be aware of everyone’s feelings I’ll have to pull the post even though 35 other people like it. OK? That’s what you want.
    Bwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
    Just kidding. Not a chance in hell am I pulling it. I suggest you either find a sense of humor, or find a site who gives a crap about your sensitivities.
    You are what’s wrong with this country.
    Steve

  18. Jeff Foxworthy publicly denies writing this article. It was written by Fritz Edmunds, who intentionally wrote it in Foxworthy’s style of humor for politicallytrue.com. Edmunds also disclosed that he borrowed some of the ideas from an email that did not contain any copyright.

  19. Kat, perhaps you should read the title again.
    If Jeff Foxworthy Took On Muslim Terrorists.
    “IF” being the important word. It does not say he wrote it. It says “IF” he wrote it.
    But thanks for the credit for F. Edmunds.

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